22, white, Capricorn, she/her, Orléans, Centre-Val de Loire, France
aro, disabled, lesbian, neuro, queer, sapphic, system, woman
Sleep tight, Ori, you've worked hard enough for too long, we need you so we had to put you to sleep but we love you so much <3
Honestly it hurt more than I was hoping it would, but I can't be surprised, I gave them an ultimatum and received nothing, so it is what it is. It's taking everything I have not to spontaneously combust right now, but I will be okay, I think, eventually, it just hurts for now.
It's sad and painful, but I've reached my limit and this is it, maybe an ultimatum is cruel, but I feel like it's more fair than doing it silently.
These were good people, or at least I thought they were, I'm not really sure what's happened but this is where it has to stop.
Sad
Why is it always 'i need some time'
Why can't you respect that I need you to meet me halfway and at least not fully cut contact all of a sudden, I don't get what I've done that means they can't even talk to me, I'm spiraling and I feel like I've lost people I care so much about
I just wanted us to be friends I swear why did it get like this why won't you talk to me anymore what did I do why why why why what did I do wrong
Everyone is leaving
Everything is falling apart
Noone will talk to me
I'm so tired
Maybe I'm the problem
Bottom //of the well// text
Tell me it's all going to be okay, promise me a future together even if you can't know for sure, let me pretend as if it's certain
I can't do the alternative anymore, just show me that future as certain and give it to me, I don't want to hope anymore.
It hurts
The planned Parenthood does do hrt I have an appointment set up for the end of the month also they have a gp I can see so that kills two birds with one stone hell yeah
The planned Parenthood in my area might also do hrt but I am going there in person tomorrow to make sure, here's hoping
Back home, so tired,,
Barista misheard my name as Maria lmao
I'm not even upset, usually when ppl do, they mishear it as Adrian instead
Someone get me out, someone someone someone let me not do this again please I don't want to do it please stop why am I doing it please let me stop myself
We're starting to breathe again, today was way too much for anyone to handle but we're still alive
I'm having a nervous breakdown over imagined abandonment I don't want to be me anymore, I want to disappear
Don't leave me
Someone please stop my brain from running off like this
At the weatherday concert last night
https://files.catbox.moe/zg2dze.jpg
We're not very good at it blame dyspraxia but here it is anyway
https://litter.catbox.moe/y0op4m8zl1esfanj.jpg
https://litter.catbox.moe/2lzi38av1f0r1h6n.jpg
The live was absolutely fire, had such a good time, super tired and someone accidentally made my nose bleed in the mosh pit but these are details, we screamed our lungs out, felt very good for once, voice a bit crackly though from singing and shouting.
I love Sputnik/Weatherday
I'm at the weatherday concert in Paris this shit is gonna be fire
Got rejected from our scholarship for a reason we weren't even made aware existed, been assuming we'd get it
Spiders, we wish more people did too, it would make us feel warm inside, they deserve it
It hurts and hurts and hurts and hurts and hurts and hurts and the thoughts never stop stop stop stop stop stop stop looping
Can't wait for the season finale so we can stop with all these drama things and just benefit from the character development
Describing us as a system, idk
Very gay, overwhelmingly gay, amazingly gay, I love my friends so God damn much I will kiss them kiss them kiss them kiss them kiss them love hug cuddle kiss aaaaaa I need to see you my friends I yearn so bad for you
*pokes you*
Why do people even still talk to me?
tonight was very overwhelming, I feel like I have to worry about everything, my future, me, my friends, my friendships, and it's overwhelming me, I feel like everything's going to go wrong if I make even once misstep and I'm tired and just want to be selfish for once
(in) secure and (over) stimmed
Like I just want all my friends here already right now!!! In my arms for me to kiss and play games and chill and talk and hug and kiss and love, and say sweet things and lay on their lap and and and
At my brother's place
Crashed on the bed
Low energy but lovelies to all the cute ppl