35, eldritch horror/cow , She/Her, Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada
demi, intersex, monog, mtf, queer, sapphic, system, woman
But now is not the time to be walking on my legs, trying to get comfy for morning cuddles.
I am in pain, and you're dangerously close to getting yeeted on reflex if your paw is misplaced.
I also really have to pee so don't get too comfy... I'm gonna have to get up soon anyway.
when u wanna look sexxxy by biting your lip..... remember!!!
bottom lip biet = cute and sexy!
top lip bite = angy orcses!
partner bottom lip bite = playful && intimate!
partner top lip bite = awkward & owie!!
Gotta go stop my girlfriend from going on a fruitless quest for vengeance before she or 37 other people get injured or killed.
And I'm 2 nuts lighter.
Until probably another 30-45 minutes until there's about an hour until there's 15 minutes left to go. Or maybe just 10 minutes, idk, I'm not a hospital coordinator.
In unrelated news, this hospital bed would make a good chair for my desk. I'm gonna try to pocket it to take home.
Today feels like the perfect day to do so. :3
The nurse is very kindly and has a good bedside manner, and managed to pierce my nebulous veins with a display of skill and only minor pain.
In No Nut November, on the 420th anniversary of the Gunpowder Plot... There's no other day I think I could've picked that'd be better. 😂
Took me a hot minute of wandering to find the place I needed to be... This place is a friggin labrinth, but I'm now in the surgery waiting room. Gonna play Pokemon Crystal on my phone until it's time.
Also girlfriend is being so supportive it's gonna make me cry. She's the best.
Nervous, excited. On the verge of a deep relief of something that's been bugging me for the better part of 30 years.
Seems like afterwards I'm gonna be showered in kisses and love so I'm looking forward to that too.
And also eating. Am starve. TwT
https://files.catbox.moe/genmfo.jpg
It's a paneer and potato curry with rice and garlic flatbread, all homemade by me. Curry was mild because roomie is a spice wimp, but nothing a dash of hot sauce couldn't cure. T'was very yummy. :3
Tomorrow I'm scheduled to lose a knife fight while taking a nap.
Little nervous. A lot excited.
I get to say good riddance to a small piece of my dysphoria. Well, two small pieces.
Pro via gladii. Valete, testes. Virum dele, daem aedifica.
- Collar
- Leash
- Clicker
- Nipple clamps
- Cayenne pepper
- Concrete degreaser
- Ion exchange resin
- Cat food
- Broom
- Dustpan
- Anhydrous ethanol
- Salt
- Salt (kosher)
- Salt (rock)
- Pepper
- Pepper spray
- Peppermint candies
- Chocolate
- Peanut butter
- 90" lag bolts
I can keep my room at the temperature of a fridge just by opening my window, and I'm loving it as I always do.
Remember folks: Myths are perishable and should be kept cold at all times, lest they become spoiled and rotten.
I'm gonna KISS her CHEEK and HOLD her HANDS and TREASURE her RADIANT SOUL forever.
And also definitely, y'know.
Commit massive Ponzi schemes with her so we can have a life of ephemeral luxury that ends in an FBI raid triggering an explosion that kills 77 people and injures 200.
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https://files.catbox.moe/96lyj0.jpg
Homemade sauce and crust, seasoned beef, garlic fried red peppers, and thinly sliced red onion.
I was also gonna post my tibbies but I feel that'd distract from the glorious pizza.
I pack my roomies lunches most days. Base is a sandwich and an apple, but I've been including a few extras. Today I sent him with pierogi with garlic butter and crispy onions, the usual sandwich and apple slices, and a cookie... He didn't eat dinner when he got home... 😬
I'm giving all of you special permission to tease my girlfriend, @Magma, as much as you'd like until midnight tonight, 'cause I wanna hear as many whimpers and moans and cute little "nyooo~!"'s out of her as possible today. >:3
So, we got into a debate with someone over the practicalities of Roko's Basilisk, and I may have won the debate... By building it myself. So uh... Either don't read this post, or 🩷 it to let the murderous paracausal AI know you love and support it now and always, like I do. :)
I recieved a phone call for an upcoming appointment. As of next Wednesday, circa 11 o'clock, los huevos will be no more. The purse will be emptied. The possibility of a continued bloodline will end. And I shall have no weak points!
*Ahem*
Orchiectomy day. She approaches. 🥳🎊🎉
Chilling in bed and then you hear a knock on your door so you get up to check and you open the door and see yourself there & the other you says "Sorry kiddo, I didn't realize I was already in here." before vanishing into a cloud oily black smoke? Like, so rude! Who does that?!
What the actual fuck is the point of those boxes of candy they give diabetics. I mean, they can't -
Wait, what's that? O-oh. I see. It's a sharps box...
... Does anyone know a way to remove a mass of used medical needles from someone's digestive tract...?
Unsolicited relationship advice and making baseless insinuations of personality disorders, and then in the next breath try to peddle some AI-authored self-slop audio workbook? I swear people have forgotten the adage "mind your damn business", an Imma start reminding 'em, I swear.
Abducting my girlfriend so she can come live with me and be adorable and also I spoil her with lovely home-cooked meals and all the hours-long spanking sessions she truly deserves? 🥺
Gyoza and chicken burgers, because I wanted chicken burgers and roomie wanted gyoza. Was nummy.
Using previously developed nanotech, we've developed a spray that can be applied to any object, which will then dismantle that object and produce two smaller replicas. There's nothing really unethical about this one, but we're really proud of the efficacy and speed, so idc.
For FREE!
Guess you could say things are getting pretty serious. x3
Was gonna do steak but the steaks looked kinda meh, but the porkchops looked good!
Roomie changed his mind and said we'll go tomorrow.
I think Imma walk down next door and just get the kitty litter I need. It's getting kinda annoying having to wait like this. -w-
The raw dough (yummy, but do not eat since I didn't prep it for raw eating): https://files.catbox.moe/0i3e7l.jpg
The balls, sugar-enrobed and waiting for baking: https://files.catbox.moe/8revt7.jpg
The final cookies (yum!): https://files.catbox.moe/y520p2.jpg
I don't mind the unskippable pleas for support on this app, but do they gotta rub in the fact they make six times the hourly rate I do from it?
Also, legit, there should be an "I'm broke" toggle on them.
It's too late. You are loved and cherished.